To the wannabe rocker guy on the bus

Ok, you got it part right. Sunglasses, black T, jeans and boots.

First of all, ditch the Faux-kleys for some Ray-Bans, even if they're fake too.

You can keep the Clash t-shirt, it's the only part you got right.

The light stonewash jeans need to go, though, bro. Think more like the James Dean that smoked and drove a Porsche roadster than the Jimmy Dean that sells chubs of sausage.

Your boots were okay, but Skechers? Really?

But, most of all... thank you. Getting a glimpse of your lyrics notebook will definitely be the highlight of my day. I believe that your tortured refrain went something like:

"Hey, strange lady.
In your sugarnight way,
Let me fill your empty
cave.

Hey, strange lady.
Won't you be my baby
and let me steal your vacant
sign."

Thanks a mint, friend. Thanks a mint.